This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
