How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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