Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Randomize
