we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
