I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
