No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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