just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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