It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize