Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize