She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
