Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
