I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
