yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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