maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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