I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize
