I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
