Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
