yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
