I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
