at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
