just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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