i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
God gave him joint rollers for hands
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
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