Buhtt sex?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
