my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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