Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize