i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
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