I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
