on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
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