I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
