im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
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