In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
