That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
