please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
