Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize