I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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