Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
