let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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