I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
