I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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