They have a pepper shaker for pot.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
