I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
