I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
