i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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