PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
