i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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