I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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