I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize