After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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