i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
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