I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
What drink are we having for lunch?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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