is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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