dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize